Thursday, April 17, 2008

Is it possible to vacuum too much? Can you jack up the pile in your carpet or something??

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Things I know this week, in no particular order:

1. Confrontation sucks. In the moment, it really sucks. But, when all is said and done, there is something very liberating about purging. The long and short of it is this: I fired the cleaning lady this week. In the moment, it sucked. She cried and she probably hates me. But, I'm feeling F-R-E-E and S-T-R-O-N-G!!

2. I would still like to move. Ah, bad news and good news all in one fell swoop . . . . could it be a possibility? Maybe (what a tease I am, I know .. . but I can't jinx my high hopes!)

3. A Dyson is worth every penny. This week, right after I fired the cleaning lady . . . I bought a vacuum. They actually aren't related to one another at all. I bought a vacuum because we needed a new one. I bought a Dyson because Homestead said to. I brought the Dyson home and set 'er up. Started vacuuming. Holy shit. I kid you not. I sucked the equivelant of a whole 'nother dog out of our carpet. And that was just downstairs. Part of it is the gimmick of that clear canister .. buy Jay-zuz, folks . . . I'm completely astounded at the gunge that came out of our carpets. Since then, I've been a vacuuming fool. And, a personal confession . . . I LOVE to vacuum. Buying a new vacuum to me is what I imagine most people feel with a new car. Repeat for emphasis: I LOVE TO VACUUM.

4. Consumer reports says: Attention all Moms: Buy Listerine SmartRinse. It is the coolest thing in dental hygiene. And, y'all know I'm totally up on oral hygiene. Couple this post-rinse stuff with "Inspector Hector the Plaque Detector" . . ooh-wee, moms . it's the perfect setup for kids fun in the toothbrushing world. You start with Inspector Hector Rinse. It turns all the problem spots blue. Think of when we were kids, we went to the dentist, chomped up that pink pill & swished it around, spit in the little toilet bowl . . and voila . . . the dentist knew you did a crappy job cuz up around all of the gums glowed flourescent pink. Well -- this is similar only the whole mouth glows blue. Then brush. Then follow that with Listerine SmartRinse. K, hang on to your hats, girls. It goes in plain green. You swish, and when you spit, all of the sugar bugs and gunk that you've missed comes out in flecks of green. It's so gross and so cool, all at once. We've had a contest here, everybody takin' turns spitting and hearing the rest of the family moan and groan . . "oh, gross . . . you did a pretty good job!" But here is what I really love about it: "mom, can I brush my teeth again?"

5. I believe I'll begin researching to buy a new car.

6. Got my haircut this week. Maintenance. Finally put my finger on all the things wrong with the Lisa Rinna hairdo that I got 6 weeks ago -- the things that just didn't work FOR ME. . . Not that they don't come together beautifully for my friend Lisa, but . . . asked for a Lisa Rinna flip with a Posh Spice option. Came out okay, I do believe. The bad news is .. . I just found this hair guy and he's leaving for Denver. I've only been in the hair-relationship for 6 weeks, and he's MOVING. I'm crushed. I'm devestated. He referred me to another "gal" in the salon . . . but if you've been reading, you know I'm a tad afraid (okay, alot afaid) of female stylists and "the vengenance cut". He promised me that she's super good. Way good. He promised me that she wouldn't give the vengeance cut. And he promised me I wouldn't walk out of the salon looking like Ming-Ming from Wonderpets. Or is Ming-Ming the duck? Heck, I don't know, but I'm talking about the guinea pig with all the funky sticky-ups.

7. All my business associates are in Chicago at a GIGANTIC conference. I'm holding down the fort at home, which has me hopelessly imagining security checkpoints and needing a quick getaway. I have my travelocity account flagged with 10 different wish-trips.

8. The Tinky one eats Rice Cereal now. I've added it to the things I'd forgotten about babies, that I truly do love. Rice Cereal in the eyebrows . . . as they blink that innocent, "what are you lookin' at?" look -- while their eyes are practically glued shut with sticky. Here's a few other things from the list, just for the sake of sharing. She's having a relationship with the ceiling fan. It's her best friend and most faithful companion (next to me, of course). She's diggin' her heels in and trying to flip over, and she can spend half an hour trying to touch her toes (heck, who does THAT remind you of??) I also love those little noises and grunts. She's trying to hold her own bottle and trying really hard to get her own paci back in her mouth, and I love to watch the contorted shapes her mouth can do when she's chasing the paci.

9. Tulips are coming up. Can you see me smiling?

10. I think 9 things is enough to know in one week.

Tuesday, April 08, 2008

Big Words

I'm on a crusade, a mission, if you will. I have a new goal. I'm teaching my children big words. The bigger the better. I'm guiding them to pronounce them correctly and use them in sentences. This, after today's light-bulb-moment.

How are we (I'm speaking society) here .... to teach our youngsters to be responsible, accountable, cooperative, appropriate and dependable if we continue to shield these words from them.

They ARE big enough. They DO understand. I may be a one-woman show ... but I'm off to an ASTRONOMICAL start. (That's today's Big Word of the Day . . . B.W.O.D.)

Ah, shucks and thanks .. I'm keeping my perspective now.

Thanks, guys . . . last week, I really stepped out on a limb and wrote/blogged about ME .. . I hardly ever open myself up to the darkness and scary thoughts of being evaluated, but I did . . . and I think I might be glad.

Someone else wrote to me and said: "I'm really sorry to hear about someone dissin' you and you getting upset about it. I always think "consider the source." Now, I don't know who your "source" was, but that source can't be as good as the true sources you have -- your real, inner self, your kids, your husband, and all the folks out here who love you and tell you good things. Man, life is just too short for people to spend time pointin' the finger and being negative towards others -- especially others who are good, loving human beings! "

Thanks!! Tons!!

Monday, April 07, 2008

Redneck Mansion

She Rolls!! (And she has rolls!)

Took Tinky for her 4 month well-baby check today.
Counted 5 rolls on the right side of her belly.
Counted 3 rolls and one in the making in the left side of her thunderous thigh.
Doctor put her down on her tum-tum to see if she can do a cobra pose or an upward facing dog.
Little one fwipped right over.
Just like that.
Doctor said . . . "Let's do that again to see if it was for real."
Doctor put her down on her tum-tum.

Mommy cheered!!!
Yes, I had a tear. I'm so proud of the rolly one!

Thanks . . .

I owe big, giant, gar-hugic thanks to Alabama Belle for the warmest, most wonderful, "I've-been-there-girl" email in the whole world.

Alabama Belle reminded me of something very central. A very important little tidbit, that I've been clinging to for the last 48 hours. And guess what?? It has totally helped!!

Here it is:

There is only ONE person that judges, that is all that is supposed to matter .......

Sunday, April 06, 2008

Merry Christmas

Y'all know I'm busy -- super busy -- with birthdays in December, so I send a note of some sort once the new year is in full swing. True, sometimes that isn't until July, August, September. Heck, some years just blur togehter, don't they.

Yea, so ... the earth stopped spinning for a few moments today. Long enough for us to take a real, live FAMILY picture. I know, I know . . . jump back, y'all. It's the third one in the last 10 years.


From our family to yours

Peace, love & happiness

I can't help -- falling in love -- with THEM!!

Friday, April 04, 2008

Who needs expensive baby toys

When you have a dish towel and a wrapper?

Some light on my dark mood

Hey, fellow bloggers. . . . do you ever wonder just who is reading your blog? I really have NO IDEA. But I can't help but wonder . . . . if anonymous readers sit down with a mug of steamy hazelnut coffee once a week and read it to catch up on my crazy life . . . does that happen? And if something tragic happens, will my blog be part of the "explanation for the mysterious disappearance of a suburban soccer mom" on the 10 o'clock news?

Is it just Homestead who is reading? Because if that is the case and given the fact that I've spoken to you, um -- 7 times this week . . . I'm thinking it's a good thing that this is a cathartic event for me -- otherwise, I'm wasting my ever-lovin' time.

I'm contemplative . . . not really a dark mood . . . but a thinking, introspective mood. Let's be honest. Here is why.

Why. That's the question. Why is what I want to know.

Why . . . in a world where I am confident, competent and happy
Why . . . in a place where I work hard and play hard
Why . . . among the dozens of people I work with and volunteer for
Why . . . among the gazillions of positive comments I've been dished

Does the ONE negative, judgemental evaluation in my life -- THIS week -- have my panties tied in a knot?

I'm contemplating what we know about ourselves vs. what people tell us about ourselves. I know all those things I listed above. I know (with certainty) that I'm a good person, I'm good at what I do . . I'm happy and easy to get along with. I know I'm great with my kids. I know I'm a kick ass nurse and any patient would be lucky to have me dealt to them, in the hand of providers they get. I'm a good wife, a good woman. I'm well rounded, efficient, smart, capable and I do a damn fine job.

And this week, I was reviewed. With scrutiny. By a fellow woman. Who means not much.

And I'm pissed. And pissy. And deflated. And defeated.

I'm pissed and pissy and deflated and defeated partly because she had the balls to judge, and mostly because I actually spent a little time this week believing her.

So, I'm left wondering -- pondering -- what we know about ourselves vs. what people tell us about ourselves. Why is it so important to get a gold star of approval? Why so important to hear a good review, receive validation or get a few kudos? Why?

We're sick this week

And that is why I haven't posted. That coupled with the fact that I'm bitter and angry and not fun to be around. I've shut myself in, with license to only escape to the pediatricians office until my mood improves. I'm working too hard and busy being underappreciated and playing the martyr. So there.